leaffan ([info]leaffan) wrote,
@ 2007-12-05 10:25:00
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fuck
In case anyone missed the email I sent, here is an English lesson courtesy of Carrie!

En-fucking-joy.

Perhaps one of the most interesting, colorful, and misunderstood words in
the English language today is the word "fuck". It is the one magical word
which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.
In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories.
It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and
intransitive (Mary was fucked by John). It can be an action verb (John
really gives a fuck), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a fuck) or
an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John).

Fuck is also used as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck). It can be used
as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful) or an interjection (Fuck! I'm
late for my date with Mary). It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary
is easy, fuck she's also stupid).

As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility
of the word "fuck".

Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used
to describe many situations:

1. Greetings "How the fuck are ya?"
2. Fraud "I got fucked by the car dealer."
3. Resignation "Oh, fuck it!"
4. Trouble "I guess I'm fucked now."
5. Aggression "FUCK YOU!"
6. Disgust "Fuck me."
7. Confusion "What the fuck.......?"
8. Difficulty "I don't understand this fucking business!"
9. Despair "Fucked again..."
10. Pleasure "I fucking couldn't be happier."
11. Displeasure "What the fuck is going on here?"
12. Lost "Where the fuck are we."
13. Disbelief "UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE!"
14. Retaliation "Up your fucking ass!"
15. Denial "I didn't fucking do it."
16. Perplexity "I know fuck all about it."
17. Apathy "Who really gives a fuck, anyhow?"
18. Suspicion "Who the fuck are you?"
19. Panic "Let's get the fuck out of here."
20. Directions "Fuck off."
21. Disbelief "How the fuck did you do that?"
22. Surprise "Fuckin' A!!"
23. Religious "Holy Fuck"

It can be used in an anatomical description- "He's a fucking asshole."
It can be used to tell time- "It's five fucking thirty."
It can be used in business- "How did I wind up with this fucking job?"
It can be maternal- "Motherfucker."
It can be political- "Fuck Hilleary Clinton!"
It has also been used by many notable people throughout history:

"What the fuck was that?"
Mayor of Hiroshima

"Where did all these fucking Indians come from?"
General George Custer

"Where the fuck is all this water coming from?"
Captain of the Titanic

"That's not a real fucking gun."
John Lennon

"Who's gonna fucking find out?"
Richard Nixon

"Heads are going to fucking roll."
Anne Boleyn

"Let the fucking woman drive."
Commander of Space Shuttle
"Challenger," Mark Thatcher

"Any fucking idiot could understand that."
Albert Einstein

"It does so fucking look like her!"
Picasso

"How the fuck did you work that out?"
Pythagoras

"You want what on the fucking ceiling?"
Michel Angelo
"Fuck a duck."
Walt Disney

"Why?- Because its fucking there!"
Edmund Hilary

"I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain?"
Joan of Arc

"Scattered fucking showers my ass."
Noah

"I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in my head."
John F. Kennedy

"What fucking map?"
Moses

"What the fuck is for dinner?"
The Jeffrey Dahlmer Party



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[info]ptc555
2007-12-05 09:18 pm UTC (link)
omg i fucking love all of them. the John F Kennedey one...LOL oh man

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]leaffan
2007-12-06 01:58 pm UTC (link)
LOL I fucking knew you'd love that! I don't think I have ever known anyone who swears as much as you do. That is a fucking compliment, of course!

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]flipthe_switch
2007-12-06 04:02 am UTC (link)
Oh god, that was awesome both times I read it. XD

(Reply to this)


[info]amm_in_paris
2007-12-06 08:17 am UTC (link)
Now everyone's gonna think I'm a fuckin' cusser.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]leaffan
2007-12-06 01:59 pm UTC (link)
Nothing could be fuckin farther from the motherfucking cocksucking truth. LOL

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)


[info]amm_in_paris
2007-12-06 02:03 pm UTC (link)
Just about sprayed my keyboard with fuckin' coffee. Lol!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

Idetrorce
(Anonymous)
2007-12-16 04:44 am UTC (link)
very interesting, but I don't agree with you
Idetrorce

(Reply to this)

Damn I miss you my friend
[info]clearwater55
2008-01-07 04:56 am UTC (link)
I'm feeling fucking down and fucking depressed and I fucking ran into your LJ as you don't appear to be on my friends of list anymore. But I knew exactly where to go for a great fucking laugh. Fucking helarious, so fucking copying this fucking lesson and fucking placing it on my LJ!

Thanks for the fucking laugh I so fucking needed it! Fucking miss you pal! Ah damnit, you fucking got me on the fucking role with the fucking word fuck!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Damn I miss you my friend
[info]leaffan
2008-01-07 02:38 pm UTC (link)
Holy fuck holy fuck, I am so fucking glad I could fucking make you feel the fuck better with a little of the old word fuck. Just fucking goes to show you that no matter how many drugs and therapies they come up with, the fucking best cure for fucking everything is the fucking word fuck!

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]danii
2008-01-12 06:03 pm UTC (link)
Hey! It's fucking Danielle. :P

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]leaffan
2008-01-12 06:30 pm UTC (link)
Hey, I fucking added you! LOL

(Reply to this) (Parent)

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(Reply to this)


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